it never ceases to amaze me how some people never fail to dissapoint.

oh well. its not something i want to get used to. but its something i've grown to rely on. enough about that.

last night was really fun. Wayne came over and we all went to Andrews with Selina. we played some Guitar Hero, which was originally going to be Candices gift but i figured if my heart and everything i had (emotionally speaking of course) wasnt enough, what would be the point of giving her Guitar Hero? i couldnt find a reason either so i'm keeping it. but yeah, we played that a lot there. I drank the rest of my jagger, about half was left so thats finally finished. then we played Wayne's card game "Bang!" which was really fun, but i dont think i played it right. i should have been working with Wayne more. we played some Soul Caliber 2 on Andrews Xbox. he finally kicked my ass, after months of utterly defeating him he's kicked my ass. i'm sure he's been practicing.

anyway, i ended up getting home around 3. probably the latest i've gone to bed in awhile i think.

i called Candice today, i wanted to know how Great America went, but her tone of voice sounded really pissed off. so it sort of pissed me off. i dont like how when you call people and if they are in a pissed off mood they have to direct it towards you. Jacob called shortly after candice hung up and it was sort of the same thing. he's depressed and he tried to make me sound like a bad guy. like its my personal mission in life to see to his happyness. fuck. obviously i'm pissed off because i miss candice more than anything. this entry is a farce. i know what i want to write here, but its too personal. in a way, this diary represents a side of me i've grown up and away from. the shy little boy who puts up a "tough" front.

i'm going to shower. i have to take Jacob to the mall. a life of servitude is all i see for myself. but the mystery is, as it has always been, who's respect will i be looking for? my dads? someone elses? or maybe for myself?

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